caring and chanting

you spend a few years caring about someone else, how they feel, what they care about, and you can't just turn it off.
and I know (from our friends) that B was hurting.
and, I miss him... i miss hanging out with him... I still grab my phone in the car to call him, and then fight the urge to call.
so, I have to keep chanting to myself, I'm doing this for my own good. be strong. i have to remember that breaking up with him, and getting over it, is what will make it possible to find another better person. someone who wants to admit he's my boyfriend.
hell, the office (US) is on... and it's set in Scranton, and he's from Scranton area, and I've been to Scranton.
i've been thinking, and reading, and making notes on every scrap of paper as to what I'm thinking.
I still feel a bit of a narcissist, but it's a necessary evil in this situation.
Honestly, I've been writing this to keep from calling everyone all the time and blabbing on and on...